My name is Esther Kodama (nee Gatward) and I was born on Stewart Island. I grew up in Bluff and attended Bluff Primary School. I moved to Auckland when I reached high school age and during a high school trip to Toyama, Japan, I fell in love with the country and kept finding ways to get back there.

I studied Japanese at the University of Otago and spent my fourth year studying at the sister university in the far north of Japan. As a Southlander I was used to a bit of cold but the harsh snowy winter there was a bit of a shock to the system. However, undeterred, once I was home again I looked for ways to go back. I applied for a job teaching English at a junior high school in Osaka. What was supposed to be a one year contract turned into three and during that time I met my future husband! He joined me back in New Zealand where we got married but both of us felt there were more opportunities for us in Japan so we moved to Osaka. 

Now I am well settled in Osaka, have been married for 13 years and we have two children, Daniel (10) and Sofia (7). They both go to the local public elementary school and speak both English and Japanese. I teach English, both in my home and in different places in my town. I also teach company classes, work as an interpreter in schools and do some translation and editing from time to time. 

Being a mum, a foreigner in Japan and a working housewife (which seems to be a peculiarly Japanese occupation) is hectic enough and I often feel like a frazzled octopus juggling multiple things and operating in two languages. And then the Coronavirus arrived. Japan was one of the first countries to get the virus, being close to China and having large numbers of both tourists and outbound travellers and the initial reaction was relatively swift in that the government decided to close the schools. Cue panic for parents, myself included. Schools closed on March 3rd about three weeks away from the end of the school year and Spring vacation. So initially the closure was to be until after the break so roughly five weeks. There was little other information or support offered and I was lucky in that by working largely from home it didn't cause too big a disruption to my life at that point. Some of my lessons were cancelled but most continued. The school sent homework packages regularly and we plodded on with those. My kids loved the sense of being on holiday but also missed school and their friends. The school had advised against playing with groups of friends or going out shopping etc so I kept them at home as much as possible, only letting them play with one friend each who lived in our neighbourhood. 

During this time other countries, including New Zealand were getting cases of coronavirus and starting to take measures to contain it. Their policies were generally much stricter and were implemented faster. Japan eventually postponed the Tokyo Olympics but very reluctantly and there were still no further steps to contain the virus. The number of cases was low here compared to other countries but so was the amount of testing being carried out. Life went on as before. I cancelled our trip home in May. I had planned to take the kids to Bluff to see my father then down to our titi island for 10 days. Don't worry, Dad said, the birds will still be there next year. I was still gutted though. It would have been my daughter's first trip to the island. 

As the new school year was about to begin and children were getting ready to return to school (funnily enough I had my kids' bags packed and by the door!), the country realised the virus was on the increase and schools would need to remain closed. Japan was finally getting that spike that many people thought we had somehow escaped. Many school entrance ceremonies were cancelled or postponed along with many sporting events and concerts or shows. People were starting to take it more seriously and stay at home. The cherry blossoms came out, usually a time of great celebration here but the parks were eerily quiet.

I feel like we entered a weird kind of limbo at this point. We weren't on lockdown but the government, after much deliberation declared a state of emergency. However, this didn't require companies and workplaces to close or reduce operations so people still went to work, often on crowded trains. There didn't seem to be any significant change other than fewer people in public places and some shopping centers closing temporarily. 

So, right now, my kids are still home from school. The new date for going back is May 6th but I haven't received any messages with further details or any new school work. We are running out of things to do at home so homework would actually be welcome at this point! My husband still goes to work every day and, as he is in sales, still visits customers around the larger Osaka area. My in-laws, both of whom are in their late 70s now, are still going out daily for groceries because that's what they've always done, despite the government (and their daughter-in-law) urging them to stay home unless it's absolutely necessary. 

For the first time since the schools closed I am starting to feel scared for Japan and the near future. Everything is uncertain and now I have cancelled all my work except for the company classes so it's only a matter of time before I start to feel the pinch financially. My kids are getting bored at home and want to go back to school or at least play with their friends more and they don't really understand why they can't. I'm trying my best to keep them entertained at home but my nerves are wearing thinner by the day and I go to bed mentally exhausted each night and unsure what news the next day will bring. My only comfort is watching what New Zealand is doing and their progress in containing the virus. I feel reassured that my whanau and friends back home are safe and well-supported by their country and their communities during this tough time.

• If you're a Southlander living (or forced to return home) from living abroad, we'd love to hear your story. Please contact us at [email protected] Likewise, if you know a Southlander living abroad, please encourage them to get in touch with us to we can all learn more about how this coronavirus is changing life for Southlanders everywhere.